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Ten Things I Wish I Could Say to Ten Different People Right Now:

1) Your irresponsibility is hurting those around you.
2) It’s time to stop holding the grudge. I had my reasons too.

3) There are things worse than loneliness; you should know.

4) Stop kicking me!
5) You are a complete waste of my time.
6) I’m not a prude, you’re a bigot.
7) Your “genius” would be much more believable if you did something with it.
8 You don’t have to save everybody.
9) I have finally learned to respect our differences.
10) You are failing because you are a lazy, good-for-nothing slacker!!

Nine Things About Myself:

1) Like most people, I think I am smarter than most people.

2) I love to sing, but I hate for anyone to hear me.
3) I am a terrible student. I am virtually everything that I can’t stand in my own students.
4) I am nothing like the person I thought I would be at 14.
5) I have no desire to be the person I thought I would be at 14.
6) After 28 years of neglect, I finally started flossing my teeth.
7) I dream about my students all the time
8 I eat chocolate almost every day. I am that bad.
9) Although I am an English teacher, I think I read less than the average person.

Eight Ways to Win My Heart:

1) give it chocolate
2) remember things about it
3) respect its passions
4) share what you love with it
5) rest your hand on my side
6) love my family
7) sing to it
8 seduce it with logic and reason

Seven Things That Cross My Mind a Lot:

1) What life will be like with two kids
2) All the students that I’m not helping
3) Food
4) The need to exercise
5) How excited I am to stay home with my family this summer
6) How much I hate northern Utah County drivers.
7) Suspenders

Six Things I Do Before I Fall Asleep:

1) take my vitamins
2) floss, brush my teeth, mouth wash
3) stretch and do stomach exercises
4) meditate

5) pray
6) tell my boys I love them

Five People Who Mean a Lot to me:

1) Ian
2) Vincent
3) Cecelia
4) The rest of my family
5) viewers like you…

Four Things I’m Wearing Right Now:

1) shoes (but only because I am at work)
2) tan pants (one of the few pairs of pants I can still wear comfortably)
3) my wedding ring

4) the necklace my husband bought me 4+ years ago (to replace the one he broke with his massive neck muscles).

Three Songs I’ve been listening to a lot lately:

1) You Don’t Know Me by Ben Folds
2) Merry Happy by Kate Nash
3) Bingo as sung by Vincent, Ian, and Myself

Two Things I Want to Do Before I Die:

1) vacation in New Zealand
2) get a Master’s degree in creative writing

One Confession:

I lack the dedication required to ever be great at anything.

Does it make me a bad parent that…

I am starting to think I’m a bad parent. You will soon see why.  The real question is, Does it make me a bad parent that my son…

can recognize and name the two main characters on Bones?

says, “I’m sexy,” while rubbing his belly when he doesn’t have a shirt on?

says, “Hi naked boy!” when he sees his father naked?

tells me it’s not ‘ppropriate for me to yell at the dog and sends me to timeout?

reminds me to say “excuse me” when I burp?

still sleeps 5 nights a week in my bed despite the hundred times that I have said we are not going to let him anymore?

can already make the boy-patented, machine-gun noise and knows to look down the barrel when he “shoots”?

when asked to stop picking his nose responds with, “But there are boogers up there!”?

Well, I know the answer is probably yes, but who has time for good parenting these days when there are so many good shows to watch on T.V.?